ah, fandom….

09 Jul

Fanboys are very, very silly people who say very, very silly things.   Sometimes, it is difficult to understand what they mean when they brush the Pirate Booty dust off their fingers and take to teh internetz to declare their loathing for some show that they will not only watch next week, but purchase action figures about.

Luckilly, Keith Topping is here to help.

Keith is an old school Doctor Who fan, the publisher of several novels, and is probably most well known in this country for his books about The West Wing and Buffy.   He is also a voracious poster to fan forums (since waay back in the rec.arts.drwho days) so he knows of which he speaks.  Even if you’re not a Who fan, I’m sure you’ll appreciate this extensive collection of socially awkward bon mots and sexually frustrated witticisms he likes to call The Doctor Who Fan’s Phrasebook.

A sample:

“I can’t even begin to describe how angry I am about the casting of Catherine Tate.”
I know that my country took part in what may well be considered an illegal war in Iraq, as a consequence of which people are still dying every hour; I know that we live daily with the terrifying threat of Intercontinental terrorism; I know that global warming poses a significant threat to all life on this planet; but what has really moved me to sign an Internet petition and vent my impotent fury, publicly, is “an actress getting a job.” I hate everyone in the entire world, including myself.


“Doctor Who these days is not a patch on the Classic series.”
Girls like it. Urgh! It can’t be any good if girls like it.


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